Showed him

On a walk today, a little yorkie started following us, barking. Loafers turned around in her seat in the wagon and shouted, "You can’t stop US, little dog!"

She’s the man.


32 weeks

Is 32 weeks the same as 8 months? AM I EIGHT MONTHS PREGO RIGHT NOW?

Pregnancy Highlights: Officially less than 2 months away now. While being pregnant is a definite highlight, I have been super uncomfortable the past week or so and it’s wearing on me bad. I’m okay usually as long as I’m walking or sleeping, but if I stretch out my legs straight while I’m sleeping, I start having contractions and if I sit too long (more than 5 seconds), I get heart palpitations and have to lay down on the floor wherever I am until I can breathe again.

How far along:  32 weeks.

Size of baby: “By now, your baby weighs 3 3/4 pounds (about the size of a large jicama) and is about 16.7 inches long, taking up a lot of space in your uterus.” Okay.

Image Source:

Say hello, Daphne.

Stretch Marks:  Nothing new.

Maternity clothes: Yes, and I’m growing out of them too. Ugh. I’m a monster.

Gender:  Girl. (Still excited about that, by the way.)

Name: Daphne middle name TBA.

Movement: Same old. She must have been sideways the past couple nights because I could feel her on both sides just stretching on out. It was… not comfy.

Sleep: Usually I don’t sleep that well. I’m rethinking this 5-9 am gig.

Exercise: I need to be doing something. My schedule is tough but I usually do feel better after I’ve walked around, or while I’m walking around.

What I miss: Legit exercise and a normal relationship with food.

Cravings: No, I basically hate food. I am getting heart palpitations pretty frequently these days, which make me feel nauseated, and now I hate every food in the world.

Aversions:  Nothing in particular, just everything.

Best moment of the week: It’s hard to say. I’m grateful to still be pregnant, but I have been feeling so uncomfortable and tired the past couple weeks. I can hardly even function.

Looking forward to: Being able to sit for two seconds without struggling to breathe. We’ll start with that.

Kid jokes

She has been in a jokey mood lately and thinks she is super funny. Here is yesterday:

Hey Mom, am I still sick?

No, you’re not still sick.

Yes, I mam (my favorite loafism–mam, not am), Mom. I’m sicks.

Oh, you are?

Yeah, Mom, I mam. Mom, it’s sicks o’clock right now.

Ladies and gentlemen, I see her dad’s old man jokes coming out. My family is obsessed with puns.


Conversations with a three-year-old:

Hey the house looks pretty good after I cleaned it, huh?

Yeah, it looks better. And Mom, I’m not even sick anymore. I was sick of all the garbage.

Point taken, sasspants.

The "love you" face is being passed on.

The “love you” face is being passed on.


I recently deleted my Facebook account. I changed my email address, Instagram (have to keep something, I guess), deleted Twitter, deleted the blogs I was following.

Why? Because anonymity. And the following problems I would like to address:


Problems with Transparency

I was posting a lot on social media. Too much. I like to not have all my life hanging out there. But I had a social media job. I had to have it. And as long as I had to have it, I would use it. A lot.

But now I feel done, and it feels better to have more freedom to choose who I follow and who follows me. I don’t like to be quite so transparent. I like to keep things to myself, to treasure those hilarious moments with my daughter, who is three-years-old and currently at the peak of her hilarity. I like things to happen and having those things happen without posting them on Facebook doesn’t make them any less valuable.

My rule of thumb is that if I were to see you at the grocery store, if I wouldn’t follow you halfway down the aisle to say hi, then I’m not going to follow you on social media either. So basically, if you see me when we’re out and about, please say hi. Let’s exchange email addresses. I am introverted but I like people. Mostly.

As a side note: My husband has the same policy. He has about 3,000 friends on Facebook and I’m pretty sure he would follow all of them down aisle 5 to say hi. Who is this guy I married? 

Problems with Caring

I was spending way too much time Facebook stalking people I didn’t care about. Too much time reading Buzzfeeds that I forgot two seconds later. Too much time reading-but-not-reading through my newsfeeds, too many blank stares at all of the stuff people were posting.

Now I hear about it: “Oh my heck, look at this thing posted on Facebook” and again with the blank stare. I don’t care. I just don’t. I don’t care about Kim Kardashian’s butt, or Alyssa Milano’s boob, or even (yes, even!) eight things I didn’t know about Parenthood.

Alright, maybe a little bit on the last one. (Although I knew all eight things. Don’t test me!)

So follow me on Instagram, or read the blog. And if the Buzzfeed is that great, make a printout of it and bring it to my house, or to the grocery store, so that when we run into each other, and you just have to share it with someone, you’ve got me.

Problems with Sharing

Facebook is funny. I get really uncomfortable with the accessibility with which everyone shares everything with everyone else.

Before social media, were we printing these things out and distributing hard copies and transcripts of every funny Ellen Degeneres or Jimmy Fallon video we ever saw? How were these things popular before people pasted them obsessively all over Facebook?

Like I said, if something awesome happens, and no one posts it on Facebook, is it still awesome? Well, maybe, maybe not. But it still happened and you enjoyed it, so write it down in your journal and call it good. Right?

Problems with Introversion

I saw a Facebook friend a couple weeks ago at the Dinosaur Museum and she said hi, and we chatted for a minute. And it felt like a real life relationship, which is good for me.

Introverts maybe shouldn’t have Facebook. It’s too easy to withdraw, to not get involved, and too easy to care-without-really-caring about what is going on in your neighborhood, with your friends, with everything. Facebook is such a passive way to do things.

I would love it if someone texted me, as a few people did when they realized that I was gone from Facebook, to see how things were going. People made the effort to find me on Instagram, to send messages to my husband about where I was and how I could be found.

And that’s life. PMs and Facebook wall posts, “likes” on photos or status updates: not real life. Not real anything. I’m introverted and I’m fine with that, but I like people and having real relationships and conversations.

Okay, at least I’m trying to like those things more.

So you won’t see me come back anytime soon. I will remind you all that I had a glorious few months (November 2012 – June 2013) where I didn’t have Facebook and life was beautiful again. I hope the change is permanent. I hope you will see me at the grocery store and say hi. I have a printout I have to show you.